my gosh. noe wad? i totally feel that life is completely unfair. i wish tat i could like go stay in another country like aussie where i can have a stressed free life with not much pressure from all e school work and everything. den it'll be so wonderful. everyone there is like sooo relaxed and everything. haiz. why do i have to live in this country where like everyone is so kiasu bout everyting.?? argh. maybe i just need to go shopping. but somehow i suddenly miss perth and the wonderful relaxed life i had there once. i dunno. life is confusing. i really really wanna super get away from everything right now. i just wish like i could go someplace nice and shop. and enjoy a stressed free life with all my darlings.
yeahh. my mind's like in a total whirl now. i've been feeling really confused lately. like sometimes i wish that i could find that special someone. den the next min i start thinkin bout school and how much i need to buck up. den i start thinkin of going shopping . den suddenly i feel like going for the *** thing. whats wrong with me? is this normal? hmmms. yupps then now i feel like really down and depressed kind. i wanna go enjoy the high life. like going to fancy restaurants, buying whatever i want. but still. thats not all to life, i shouldn't be feeling this way. maybe all i need rite now is God. i need him back in my life again. maybe when i have god , i don't need all tyhese material possesions to cheer me up. haiz. dunno what to do.

its like yesterday mom found the pics in the bloody recycle bin in the com. stupid bin. why must store it there when i already deleted them?? argh suck. who knows what other pics there are in there. and she saw all of them . i feel my privacy's like being exposed. and now. everythings not going smoothly. i might not be able to even stay over and tues nite at lianne's place. haiz. dunno dunno dunno dunno. humph. i wanna sleep a deep sleep and den wake up to a better place. leve all my troubles FOREVER!! whee~

heys. last nite i talked to mum and dad bout my results thingy. instead they were very understanding bout it and very nice too! they dint even scold me! all they did was encouraged me and told me not to lose confidence and dont blame myself! (: wow such nice parents i have((: hahas. yeahh anyways today went out with mich and lianne to taka to shop and look for great singapore sale stuffs! woah it was like superly crowded man! anyways we were like looking at mango and den fox and Wh. omg i love Wh ! i think their clothes are like really nice and since now there's like sale its even more affordable and cheaper too!! yay so i bought this black halter thingy . cost only 9 bucks and it was nice too! anyways me mich and lianne were like hungry again den all of us were like craving for fries! so we went to macs and like bought yummy twister fries! haiz stupid lar. all of us NOT supposed to eat fast food but everytime we just end up eating it again . humph! this is bad! they're like so much calories in it!
argh oh wells. us being us were being crazy again hahas den we took many pics too . especially the one where we were at the lingerie section . then we were all VERY fascinated by those strapless silicon bras. hahas den we kept on poking at it cos it felt so much llike jelly . then we 3 crazy girls were like laughing away like mad ppl. so mich and lianne took up one each and posed for a pic with the silicon thingys!! hahas hope no one actually noticed us!!
yeahh den by the time i had to rush home AGAIN as always. haiz so when i reached tanah merah i actually climbed over the metal bar thingys in my SKIRT to save time . and den i ran with all my might home. anyways glad mich was there to watch out. she was so amused by it. but a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do when she's rushing for time and she doesnt wanna get into trouble (: haiz. anyways it happens everytime. i'm alr an expert at climbing over that thingy due to the many times i'm late. hahs!
yupps. tmr got church! yay. now i dunno whether i should follow mom and dad and the whole family to malaysia or should i go for the youth tabernacle camp?? but it'll be fun! with adrina , sha and everyone else den we can like sooo hang out at east coast. itll be like last year. but aiya. i'm sooo confused now. dunno which one to choose. oh wells thats it den.

i feel so sucky now ): cos mum and dad just went to school to collect my report book and wells lopez like keep on sayin that i'm so blur and forever daydreaming in class. argh!! i mean like what??! a shopaholic just cant HELP thinkin bout shopping and making a mental shopping list in her mind can she? humph. anyways my results just totally sucked. i mean i kinda expected my class position to be the last but i really really didnt expect it to be true. haiz. yeahh and my level positins like superly 10 times worse!! dont wanna talk bout it ! anyways i feel like i'm so not up to standard and if this continues how am i ever gonna cope next year and get into sajc?? okok vanessa. better calm down now and think fast. you've GOTTA soooo buck up!! end of this year i shall aim for all my subjects to be no lower than B4 ! yay okok i must and can do it!! yeahh i seriously need to do all my hw during this hols and when school reopens, i'm gonna pay attention during lessons and work super duper hard!! cant afford to fail. omg but still.. my level position's never been this LOW before!! argh. MUST WORK HARD!

heya ((: i'm blogging this at like 12am now. its still thurs nite for me. just came back from touchdance rehearsal at tct . haiz. today was the auditions. though it was fun but i was sooo nervous that i kinda flunked most of the steps!! haiz den i cant prove myself to pastor and the others tht i'm a good dancer and serious bout serving God!! aiya. anyways we danced hip hop to "jump around" by planetshakers! sooo punky like hahas. den lyrical jazz to "made me glad". noe wad?? now im really really determined to be a strong and skilled dancer so that i can serve god better((: den kelvin, our sort of instructor for tonight told me and adrina that we have alot of potential to e a great dancer but we gotta work twice as hard!! BUT i dun care, i'm soooo gonna do it! i feel so encouraged now that he said that! den he also said we should try to take classes outside to improve our tecnique. HAIZ . if only i had made full use of the 100 dollars for the studio wu dance classes! now i feel so guilty bout wasting my parents money that i dun dare ask them to pay for my dance classes alr. i really wish like i could take up jazz classes at like jitterbugs or any otehr dance school again. so sad. but i'm so determined that i defintely gona ask my parents to get me a pair of jazz sneakers for my birthday!! which is like so long more. but one pair costs like over 100 bucks :( anyways next week we're gonna noe like which grp we're gonna be put in. i really hope that me and adrina would be in the same grp and in a nice grp too!! i hope it wont be ahem's group though. cant help it but its like i just feel she's kinda bias towards us. oh wells. yeahh, tmr no school ((:

yar. today morning. was tryin to decide with mich and lianne whether to go school today. haiya den in the end had to rush like soooo last min to go sch. me and mich had to go. lianne's lucky. whole week nvr go school! anyway my purpose of going school today was to actually passs the mc to lopez. but guess wad?! i forgot to bring my wallet and my mc's in my wallet!! argh. but anyways lopez also didnt ask for it . so yar. pls pls i sooo hope she wont mention anything to mom tmr during parent-teacher conference. school was boring. had this sooo boring prayer svc. and just found out i got TONS of stupid freakin HOMEWORK!! argh!! so irritating los. wth :(not fair. got sooo many stupid essays to write!!! i feeel like i'm sooo gonna scream! this is like the hols if they didnt noe. it s SUPPOSED to be RELAXING! anyways stupid sch.
yeah so after sch it was raining terribly heavy. den shawnie picked me up to have tea with her at parkway swissbake. it was nice . talked bout lots of things. yeah so thats all for today.
GREAT SINGAPORE SALE is here!! there's SALE everywhere! but unfortunately i'm like so broke :( so many ppl owes me money aand i HAVE to get it back!! argh.i neeed to shop! gto like sooo many things i needa buy! hmmm. wells thats all den. gonnna sleep like now. need BEAUTY SLEEP!! hahas. its a girl thing (:

22nd May 2006

hey now i'm trying out to blog ((: but this blog wont be in public first.. just tryin out hahahs. cos im lazy to write down evrything in my diary !! hand tired also! HAHA wells. i'm gonna start by tellin you wad happened today!! a very nice and wonderful day! CRAZY TOO !
ok so today me, mich and lianne went to sentosa!! den i met li anne in the morning outside mich's house and off we took a cab to her house den we like got prepared like get changed into our beach wear! it was sooo fun! cos we were like crapping aroud and taking pics and stuffs. yeah so after everything took mrt to harbourfront where we took e sentosa bus . den took another bus to e palawan and siloso beach there where we took the ultra coool beach tram ! den when we arrived at siloso beach it was like so freakin empty and quiet . so we just walk here and there and took many pics ((: hopped ont o e beach trm again where the uncle driver made us so pai say! den everyone was like laughing at us 3 gurls! hahha den went to palawan whwere it was much beter cos we crossed thereally FUN bridge where last time we had teh ohana camp ther!! finally can relieve those wonderful memories! den went to e beach where i swam in the sea during the camp too! wow haha i miss those times! anyways we were like damn hungry so we went to the 7-11 and we went crazy over all the delicious looking food!! ahahs but thats cos we were seriously starving!! SO WE BOUGHT CUP NOODLES AND ENJOYED THEM AT THE NICE TABLEs THEY HAD INSIDE..
den later we bought this tub of raspberry ripple icecream and some chocolates and brought it to e beach where we enjoyed them on the mickey mouse beach towel! haha after which we wrote our names in the sand and tookmore pics! well it was time to wash up after that so we went to sentosa's really nice toilets. yeah den time to go. we were sooo dead beat that we slept on all the bus and train rides back to li anne's house.
wells. DILEMMA!! we had not gotten our mcs that would save our lives!! so back at li anne's house we were like so lazy so we tot of many ways to fall sick so that we can dont go stoopid school tmr. den li anne suggeted panadol and coke. ahha den us being crazy we actually tried it and we were like sooo bloated after all e coke. for me i still dunno why!! forever no effect!!
nvm wells so luckily for mr mum and dad not home so me and mich met after dinner and after stufffing myself with all e wrong food. so nervous at e clinic but thanks to all e coke. the doctor believed me! and mich too. but GUESS WAD?! mich's 'medical' fees were 18 bucks! and mone was 16!! but no choice anyways cos if dun ask for medicine den it'll be super suspicious. and the staff there just found out we came together too ! but anyways we were free den!! YAY! cos we both got 2 days mc too! and lianne too hahas!! YAY SO TUES NO NEED GO SCHOOL!! ahahaha!

23rd May 2006

yay so today i slept in. but mich had to go to school cos she had no choise. den when she came home she told us how boring school was den she didnt wanna go school tmr too. wells me and lianne also got into the mood of not going school so yeah . we made plans to tell our parents that we got headache or whatever blah blah. so yeahh.thats all.

24th May 2006

today woke up from an sms from mich and lianne. we were tellin each other whether we could go sch or not so yay! both of them couldnt. so myturn was next and yay! I also didnt have to go school!! hahah den slept until 1 today. yupps confernced with them again. mich wanted to watch agent cody banks at lianne's house. but i couldnt cos too rush for me !! aiya got tuition at 530pm. den mom was like tellin me to rest. oh wells so here i am creating this new blog ((:

i seriously feel all i can think bout when things get boring is shopping, shopping, and more shopping. cos during tuition this was wad was going thru my mind.

teacher: so you take x as a factor of 2, and den the reminder you take..

me: omg i seriously need to buy that XXL mascara!!

hahahs so thats me.

omg. gtg like now!!