i've just been thinkin . how time flies and how much more fun 2005 was . now its like . . everythings all gone . it was exactly one year ago on this sunday that it was rin's parents wedding and like after that me sha rin and xb had fun taking neoprints at TM and i was just looking at it justnow and like its just so fast . like one year already . and i just missed those times . with all the conferencing every night . and the outings . now its just all so different already . last year was SO much fun-ner . and like i kinda miss the TOILET GANG . me sha adrina and kerin. cos we ALWAYS hang out at the toilet talking during service at tc . wells . . even though its wrong and all , it was like sooo fun ! and like all the 'adventures' we had together ! like talking about our crushes after service and like looking for 'people' and our weekly hot gossips . even though the friendship was kinda superficial and all , we DID have fun times together . and we went thru alot . especially that 'outburst' on one saturday night last year . now . . we've moved to expo and things changed . rin's not with us anymore and like so is adrina . i just wish that that thing didnt happen and all of us knew how to handle it the right way . now its just me and sha left . and we're all growing older every week . argh lets all stop pretending and wanting to be older and just ENJOY our youth and be CRAZY . like just HAVE FUN and all . i feel so trapped . cos everyth 's all gone and i dont have a single idea what to do about it . people dont neccessarily LISTEN you know . i think everyth i say sounds confusing now . but maybe its supposed to be cos these things are kinda private . i just wish my whole cell would be back together again with all the people last time that has left us now . like LAST YEAR AND 2004 ! everyth was so nice and happy then . now after church its like . . . dead . cos no one's really there . i miss those people . sigh . i feel so lost AND THIS ISNT THE FIRST TIME I'M FEELING LIKE THIS COS OF THIS WHOLE ISSUE !